The Fleishman Center is proud to feature and highlight the amazing story of Binghamton University alumna Haley Motola, current Epidemiologist, as she shares her journey and reflects on navigating college and the workforce while living with a disability. Haley shares how her disability has shaped her perspective, built resilience and informed her professional journey.
Can you share a bit about your journey and how your disability has shaped your personal or professional life?
There are many things in life that truly shape you into the person that you are. A chronic illness can certainly change your life in an instant. I was diagnosed with epilepsy when I was 19. My epilepsy is the kind that you might see on TV; the very dramatic tonic clonic seizures. As a young person, I was very much in denial. It might be similar to the stages of grief one may go through after the death of a loved one, as in a sense, it is the death of a certain expectation you had for your life. I spent the next seven or so years trying to control these seizures. There was always a new trigger or a medication that failed.
Within my personal life, I certainly struggled immensely. I wondered why I had to be plagued with a disease that truly acts on the unknown. There was nothing structurally wrong with my brain and no “Ah ha” moment that gave me any sort of closure. It was a time of great uncertainty, fear, and depression. It also happened to be during another act of the unknown filled with uncertainty- and that is college!
Were there any specific support systems, resources, or people at Binghamton University that made a difference for you?
I came to Binghamton University with a love and passion for human disease, specifically osteological related pathology. I was able to share the struggle I faced with epilepsy with Dr. DiGangi as I went into starting my MS in Biomedical Anthropology; the perfect mix of the human condition and the diseases that plague us.
Grad school is tough, as it should be! Not only did I strive to become a great scientist, but I also wanted to live a seizure free life at the same time. I still struggled immensely trying to decide if telling people about my condition would lead to stigma, or if my fear of sharing my diagnosis would let that stigma continue. Once I graduated, I knew I had to overcome my fear of acknowledging my disease.
What advice would you give to current students with disabilities navigating college life?
To students at Binghamton University and beyond, having a disability that impacts your life in every way possible, you can use that as a means to a positive end. It will always be a part of you, but it is not the only part. You can have a disability and be a scientist. You can have a disability and become a mentor, a colleague, a public figure, and published author and more. You will not live the same life you may have planned for, but it may be better in a sense. It may give you a unique skill set, empathy you never knew you could feel and a new appreciation for your own life and the lives of others.
How has your disability influenced your career path or your approach to your work?
In 2020, I was offered the position of Epidemiologist for the Sullivan County Department of Public Health. It was truly a job I was made and prepared for. I love every moment of fighting disease. I know what it is like to have a disease, one that I cannot get rid of. I have made it my mission to use what I have learned from all the incredible professors, especially my advisor, Dr. DiGangi, who saw me for the person I was, epilepsy and all, instead of just someone with a disability. Shortly after I started my job, I had my last seizure. I have now been seizure free for five years, and I hope I can continue that streak for the rest of my life. Instead of being depressed about my disease, I have used it as a catalyst to help others. I may not have the magic abilities to prevent others from being diagnosed with epilepsy, but I can certainly stop someone from developing chronic illnesses caused by infectious disease by preventing the domino effect of transmission. I hope that my struggle can be a blessing to others.
What does Disability Pride Month mean to you?
Epilepsy has changed the way I have to live my life. That includes medication and some serious need for sleep each night! I had to find a path that worked for me, even if that meant letting go of my insecurity and letting Dr. DiGangi know my struggle. I was never judged. Being at Binghamton gave me something to truly strive for. I wanted to be a scientist in some capacity, and in the end, three months after graduation, my dreams came true, and I think I am a better epidemiologist due to my struggles. It will never be easy, but having the support system at Binghamton showed me that it is possible to strive for excellence. If you have a disability, let it become your driving force. Let it become a way to connect with others that may be struggling in the same place you were just a few years prior. Let it be a part of you but know that it is just that- a small part of a much bigger picture, and that picture can be whatever you want it to be. If I can do it, anyone can-especially at Binghamton University!
